Clarissa Has a Blog

sometimes, I explain it all.

Can 2016 be over already?! — 14/10/2016

Can 2016 be over already?!

WHOA. I haven’t updated this in awhile but for good reason. The semester I was ragging on in my last post finally ended and I headed to Costa Rica. I didn’t make it very long in CR because of poor management within the company I was interning with (seriously people, keep your personal life separate from your professional) and my mom passed away (in my previous post, I mentioned that she was sick dealing with chemo), I spent the rest of my summer grieving the loss of my mother and dealing with a psycho and abusive boyfriend that thankfully is out of my life now. School started back up and I got in an accident and I’ve been without a car ever since. I just want to go home and hang with my family. Maybe sometime soon..

The good news about 2016 is: I’m graduating in December (FINALLY) and I got an internship to work at Disney World – again! But other than that… I’m ready for you, 2017.

Also… not having a car isn’t that bad. I’ve had a lot of time to process life and I’ve learned how to be better prepared – I walk everywhere, I plan ahead for meals, etc. And I’ve learned how to rely on people (can’t get to class without my good friend, Halle – shout out, you da best).

I miss you, momma. So unbelievably much.

I’m walking in less than a month in a 3-day 60 mile walk with Komen to raise awareness for breast cancer. I haven’t trained nearly as much as I should have but this weekend I’ll be spending each day hiking at Purgatory Creek (a park with a lot of trails in San Marcos) that’s luckily a 5 minute walk from my apartment. The 3-day walk is the first weekend in November in Dallas and it’s going to be a really emotional weekend but I’m looking forward to walking in her memory with one of her friends (who is a breast cancer survivor). I had to raise at least $2300 to participate and I was completely funded by the end of July (only a month after my mom passed away and 3 weeks after I decided to participate).

I’m starting to get sick, and I just finished the Hulu original show ‘Difficult People’. Really funny show and now I’m left finding something new to watch. If you’re reading this, give me suggestions.

I went to a TEFL seminar on campus today – TEFL stands for Teaching English as a Foreign Language. I’ve wanted to go abroad and teach English for maybe two years now and I learned a lot about the program today and it really lit me up, I hope to be able to apply and start that journey in a year or so.

Well, that’s all for now. I need to get back to blogging again, so if there’s anyone who reads this update, I will and thanks for reading! xo

Advertisements
Titles are for Squares — 20/04/2016

Titles are for Squares

This semester has been crazy. I don’t want to say it’s been Hell because that makes it sound like nothing happy has happened which isn’t true but I’ve without a doubt, been stressed out. What’s the saying, “too blessed to be stressed”?

The semester is nearing its end and thank God for that. Can I get an amen?! I’m taking 19 hours this semester, working on my internship for this summer, and working part-time at Old Navy. That’s just right now, earlier this semester I had all that plus I was putting on an event with the city (it kicked so much ass). I’ve been busy, and that’s just scratching the surface, my readers. My sweet momma started chemo and a week later got really sick and has been in the hospital now for 3 weeks. I’ve also been in a relationship with the guy who lives upstairs that might not be the best for me (still waiting to find out), and I have also been trying to stop drinking and partying so much (going on my second week without a drink, woot!). I’d like a break and a break is what I’m going to get!!… in 3 weeks when I can chill and start packing for my 2 month adventure to Costa Rica.

When I’m in Costa Rica, I’ll be blogging a whole lot more. I’ll be writing here, and on the blog that the company I’m interning for runs. I hope to do a lot of interesting things while I’m there, I’m going to really touch up my Spanish with a 2 week course and I might even learn to surf! I haven’t started my countdown yet but I GOT MY PLANE TICKET TODAY SO SHIT JUST GOT REAL!

I’m ready to be at the beach already with my laptop and type away and away and away.

Senior Year — 19/01/2016

Senior Year

I’m starting my Senior Year of college tomorrow and I’m super nervous. I can’t believe it’s going to end soon. There is a finish line in sight. How unreal.

I’m super unprepared though, YAY ME (lol)! I have my pencils but I don’t have my spirals, books, or even my schedule printed out. But it will okay! I will survive this semester and it will be December before I know it.

18 hours, here I come!

Hobbies… — 05/01/2016

Hobbies…

When someone asks, “What do you do for fun?”, to my knowledge, most people reply with “I like to hang out with my friends, watch Netflix, go shopping…” but when we’re asked, “What are your hobbies?”, I’ve noticed that it stumps most of us. I, for one, do not have a hobby. It dawned on me not too long ago that I don’t do anything therapeutic, I don’t do anything that requires skill.

I want to find a hobby in 2016 but I don’t know what it will be. I’ve asked around and even had a long chat with a classmate this morning, and most people reply with “painting” or “learn an instrument”. One person even replied with “you could learn a new language”. All of the above sound interesting but I’m still not sold… I think I’m going about this the wrong way.

I should be DOING instead of WONDERING. I need to TRY. I’m afraid of how hard it may be, I’m afraid of giving up. I’m afraid of 2016 ending and I still don’t have a hobby. So until I find my calling, I will try multiple things and hope for the best.

Here’s to trying new things!

2016 — 04/01/2016

2016

I can’t believe 2016 is finally here. I’ve been waiting for this since 2012 when I started college at Stephen F. Austin State University. This is the year I’m turning 22 and graduating with my undergrad degree. I’m unfortunately going to be graduating a semester late but I’ve worked so hard to still finish within the same year. I’m not graduating from the same university I started at either. I’ll be walking across the Texas State University’s stage and jumping into the San Marcos river with all my closest friends come December. Then, ADULTHOOD.

This being said — 2016 will have its challenges, challenges my family and I have never dealt with before. My momma was diagnosed with breast cancer back in September. She had a double mastectomy in November and the doctor’s decided to do 6 months of chemo to prevent anything or kill any cells that may have spread; she starts her treatment this month. (if you’re reading this, we’d appreciate all the prayers or good vibes we can get). My mom is a fighter though, she’ll be okay. I love you, momma!

Resolutions: to give up chocolate (It makes me sick but I eat it anyway…), not panic so much thinking about the future, and to find a hobby (if you have any suggestions, let me know!!)

Here’s to 2016!

To My Childhood Best Friend — 03/01/2016

To My Childhood Best Friend

We were the best of friends for 14 years but suddenly, we drifted apart. I want you to know that I don’t blame you; I moved away after high school and you stayed home. We were no longer growing on the same path and that’s okay. I’m proud of you for all you’ve done these past 3 1/2 years and I hope you continue to flourish. I’m so proud of you.

Whether you’re worried about me or not, I also want you to know that I’m okay. Being away from you and our group of childhood friends was challenging at first. I watched you all grow closer while I was away. I would be jealous, maybe even a little hurt at times. I’d come home to visit and realize that I didn’t have anything in common with y’all anymore. In exchange for this sacrifice though, I met people from all over that I get to call my friends. I moved all over the state, one time I even moved to Orlando, I moved into several different apartments over the years, and I have a bunch of roommate stories (call me sometime, I’d love to tell you them). How cool is that? If I stayed home with my parents, I would have missed out on so much. I’m happy with my sacrifice. I’m happy.

I miss you, but what I realize is that I really miss the past. When we’d make friendship bracelets, go out to eat with each others families, have game nights, go bowling, talk about boys, text each other random thoughts, run on the ice (not our best idea), paint each others nails, bake till the middle of the night, watch scary movies and scare each other all night, etc. When did we grow up? Where did the time go? Now we grab coffee and catch up every 5 months. I don’t even like coffee.

I hope you’ve found happiness, too. I hope you’ve moved on from the boy who broke your heart, I hope you’ve learned how to let loose a little, to accept that you’ve done everything you can, I hope you’ve learned to just breathe. I hope you know that I’m still a phone call away, and that I always will be.

Maybe one day our friendship will rekindle, and we can bake again for hours on end but I’m not going to hold my breath anymore, I’ve moved on and am no longer angry anymore. I’ve realized that I have many best friends and you were my childhood best friend. I’ve had a best friend for every stage of life, someone who has helped me through that chapter of my life.

I’m thankful for the time we had and the memories we shared and I hope you are, too.

Beowulf – Why?! — 17/12/2015

Beowulf – Why?!

For my British Literature course I’m taking over Winter break we read Beowulf. I actually find the epic poem to be very interesting and a good read, once translated. However, the movie adaptation was awful. Grendel looked awful, Angelia Jolie was a terrible choice for his mom (really? she’s not scary) and animation was a terrible way to go.

What did y’all think? I couldn’t even finish the film because I was so disgusted by the graphics and sound effects.